Young and Married. Don't let anyone stop you.
60My Story: Young & Married to the Military.
Right after my 20th birthday I only had one thing in mind: To fly to South Korea, and marry the man I loved. Let me put emphasis into the fact that yes, I was only 20 years old. I had known my soon to be husband since I was 15 years old. We had remained friends for a very long time, but only began dating shortly before he left for South Korea. My family and my friends were completely outraged by this fact. No one believed me when I said I was going to travel half way across the world and get married. They especially didn't believe me when I said that after I got married that I planned to live in South Korea. However, I've never been the type of person to let people tell me what to do.
Young and Married. Don't let anyone stop you
When I left the US everyone expected that within a month or so I'd be home, with my tail in between my legs. However, I bought the biggest suitcase I could possibly find, and packed my life into it. I quit my terrible job of four years, and transferred all of my campus classes to distant learning classes. I knew in my heart that I was serious about my decision, and nothing was going to stop me from getting what I wanted.
However, all of this is just insight into the bigger picture that I am trying to produce. Every single person that I talked to at this time told me that I was absolutely insane. I was: too young, throwing my life away, giving up too much, and making a huge mistake. Well, three years later, and they're asking when the babies going to be due. At this point the only person who really gave me motivation was my grandmother. Right after my husband (fiance at the time) had proposed, I went to have a chat with her. She sat me down and asked me one vital question: "Lydia, do you love this man?". My response to this was "Of course I love him, would I have said yes if I didn't?". My grandmother then replied to this statement with: "If you love him, don't let anything stop you".
I am not sure within today's world what exactly it is that makes people believe that getting married at a young age is a bad thing. I think its pretty funny actually, as people who married 50 years ago did it at a much younger age, and the divorce rate was incredibly lower then it is now. In the military world getting married at a young age is incredibly common. I read the statistic somewhere awhile back, that the average age of a military wife is 19 years old. Now, military marriages have their problems, but I am happy to be the exception.
I am not saying that I believe that everyone should run out and marry their high school sweethearts. Actually, I am saying the exact opposite of that. However, when you find the person that you love, don't let anyone stop you. If something deep within you tells you its the right thing to do, well, it probably is.
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No problem! If you ever want anyone to talk to, Im more than willing to listen. My husband just got out of the army a couple of days ago actually. The military is a tough world, good luck girl!
That is a beautiful story. I love it, as long as you follow your truth whole heartedly only wonderful things will befall you. In some ways I wish my husband and I had married sooner so we could have grown together and not been two very independent single people trying to create a joint life together when we both had very different plans for our future. Good luck!
Thank you soo much for this! I am 19 years old and plan on marrying my now fiancé next summer when he's finally out the army. We have only been together for a year an six month but I cannot see my self with anyone rather than him. He just came home for four days from Colorado just to get engaged with me and I thought it was the best thing anyone had done for me. Unlike you my family and his are being very supportive although they question our young age. I believe getting married this young will only give us the chance to grow and learn together. Am so happy for you, your such a brave woman. Now when anyone says I'm to young to marry I won't think twice about it and just remember your story.
First off, I want to tell you I am so happy for you and your husband and that things worked out well for you both. I also wish I had your strength. I lost my yiayia (grandmother in Greek) when I was 12 years old and she was the only person who supported me in everything I did. My mom was never much of a parent to me until after she passed and our relationship has always been kind of rocky. I say all this to help explain why I'm having trouble finding the courage to tell my mom me and my boyfriend are planning on getting married before he deploys to Kuwait next summer. We will both be 20 by then and we've been together for almost 3 years. We've already made it through BCT and AIT which kept us apart for 6 months and then have been attending separate colleges. I have no doubt in my heart that I will spend the rest of my life with him. I would be fine waiting on him, but this is something very important to him that he wants to do before he leaves. I want to marry him just as much as he does me but I know I won't have the same support he does. His parents began dating when they were 12 and married at 18 and have been married 40+ years now. My mom has been married 3 times and is very controlling over me and my sisters and brother. I'm not afraid to get married and start my life with him, and I am not afraid to disappoint my family, because I know that in the long run they will realize me and him knew what we signed up for and we will be together forever. What concerns me is being cut off from college funds. I know I need to finish school and my mom and step-dad pay for that. so....do you have any advice?
nora.elizabeth 16 months ago
Thank you for this. I am about to marry my fiance who is in the Navy. We have been long distance pretty much our entire relationship. I just needed this good story to tell me that this can work out. I have just been stressed with the military leading up to our marriage. This was great :) Thank you!